Gleewind : S01E13

 Just The Facts: Sectionals has arrived at William McKinley High School. As you'll recall from last time, shit got real. It's only going to get worse as the glee club goes to Sectionals, Will's marriage explodes, and Emma's wedding to Ken looms in the very near future. The glee club needs a new director for Sectionals, and that is just the beginning of the problems that need wrapped up before the season break. So, prepare yourselves for the exciting conclusion to Part One of Glee. After this episode aired, we had to wait for freaking ever before we got a new episode. I nearly peed myself. No joke. When they finally announced that new episodes were starting up again, I was happier than a pig in a bucket of warm mud.

Why does Mercedes always look like she smelled bad fish?

The episode opens in the choir hall. The students are discussing who they'll end up having to rely on as their faculty advisor for the upcoming Sectionals performance. If you don't recall, after walking out on his wife, who was faking being pregnant because she's a stupid fucking whorecuntbitch, Will was disqualified from sectionals and as such, the students need a new advisor. This discussion is quickly derailed, as Rachel enters, concerned that Puck has been showing too much attention to Quinn. It seems that Rachel, motor-mouth, is the only person, aside from Finn, who doesn't know that Puck is Quinn's real baby-daddy. Mercedes is the motor-mouth in this situation though, because she's the one who done gone and told everybody. There is a great scene where the entire glee club, sans Puck, Quinn, Rachel and Finn all discuss how Mercedes told everybody. I don't know what it is about split-screen phone dialogue that makes me laugh, but I really do love it. If you've not actually watched this episode, which I've already suggested you watch when I recapped the sectionals episode of the current season, you need to for this scene.

"Sex isn't dating." - Santana. "If it were, Santana and I would be dating" - Brittany

They determine that they can't let Rachel figure it out, because if she tells Finn everything is done for. In her office, Will and Emma discuss Emma becoming the faculty advisor for New Directions. You may remember from last episode that Emma and Ken have scheduled their wedding for that same day. Will expresses some concern that Ken won't be ok with this, and Emma assures him that everything is perfectly fine and Ken totally understands that she's doing it for the kids. In a flash back, we discover that Ken is not ok with this at all. He's actually really pissed off.

"Does this have to happen tonight? I have my fight club"

Meanwhile, Rachel instigates all kinds of crazy by asking if Quinn's baby has been tested for Tay Sachs Disease. She casually let's it slip that she's silly for even asking since one of the parents would have to be Jewish. This prompts Quinn to ask Puck to take her to have the Jewish Baby Tests done at the OBGYN.  Before they can make a decision, Will announces that Emma will be the new advisor. Brittany reveals that Emma's they one they made her talk to when they found out she was keeping a dead bird in her locker. The kids are less-than enthused about the choice, but are willing to give Emma a chance. They discuss their performance options for Saturday, and there is a bitchfest between Mercedes and Rachel about who should perform the Ballad. After Mercedes does the stereotypical black woman song, of And I Am Telling You, from Dreamgirls, they decide on Proud Mary, Don't Stop Believin' and the previously mentioned stereotype song.

At eight minutes in the episode, frankenteen congratulates Rachel on her willingness to give up the chance at a solo Ballad. She, of course only caring about herself, takes the opportunity to weasel her way closer to Finn. She then says the words that everybody hates to hear, "I want you to be happy, Finn." This leads into her telling him about her suspicions that Puck is the father. After a brief word from our sponsors, the next scene we see is Finn beating the shit out of Puck on the choir room floor. Rachel really does love to put her nose were is doesn't fucking belong. Everybody knows that this had nothing to do with making sure Finn was happy, and everything to do with making sure that she was painted as a fucking saint in his eyes. I really don't like Rachel right now. Stupid bitch. Drama unfolds, and Finn quits New Directions with the line that will be mirrored a year later, "I'm done with you," he storms out å la Rachel.

Rachel and Quinn have a heart to heart. Quinn admits that she's not mad at Rachel. Rachel barely redeems herself by admitting that she was selfish for telling him. There is a part in the scene where it feels like a lifetime movie was compressed into ten seconds and put on screen. Realistically, none of the next four minutes of dialogue matters in the slightest. This also brings to light a bit of confusion for me. Where the hell is Quinn going to live? If you remember, she was kicked out of her parents' house and has been living with Finn for the past couple of episodes. Whoever was responsible for continuity in these episodes needed to lose their job really quick. I'm sure I've touched on, and by touched on I mean bitched about, it before, but the continuity in this show is desperately lacking.

The next day, we discover that Jacob Ben Israel has taken Finn's place in competition. He's encouraged not to sing, and instead to sway in the background. The whole crew gets on the bus to head out for sectionals. It's handicapable. Yay! You'll remember that this was the subject of much consternation and grumbling in a previous episode, specifically the episode where the got the song Proud Mary from. At Sectionals, we discover that New Directions has drawn the third competition slot, which means that the other two teams will be performing first. Great, right? Not so much. Sue has leaked the set-list. The hairography crew is back, and the School for Girls performs both And I'm Telling You & Proud Mary (in wheelchairs). The students are shocked and astounded, and terrified. Emma calls Will freaking out, and he promises to find some way to help.

He has a GREAT fight with Sue in the hallway. I can't even remember a time when I hated Sue anymore. She seems essential to this show even early in the episodes. Jane Lynch really has taken the role and made it her own. There is something about her portrayal of an evil bitch that makes things come together for this show. I couldn't imagine a different antagonist. Their fights are beautiful. They smack of self-righteous indignation.  Not to mention her hair jokes. She has a way of pushing Will in ways that I couldn't imagine anybody else even attempting. I was actually disappointed to see her leave the role as primary antagonist for a brief while.

In the locker room, Will tells Finn what's happening at Sectionals. He 'accidentally' leaves the keys to his car on a bench, and Finn takes a hint. Before heading out to join the rest of Glee club, Finn grabs some sheet music and destroys the Cheerios' copier. While he's driving, Emma confronts the directors for the other two teams. She essentially calls them liar stupid heads. They of course defend their position and say they've done nothing wrong. The deaf kids perform a hilarious rendition of Don't Stop Believin. Rachel calls a meeting in the Green Room. They discuss options for other songs to perform. They settle on Somebody to Love, Don't Rain on My Parade and then Finn enters with You Can't Always Get What You Want. They have an hour to prepare for their performance. They perform all three songs while Will listens on the phone.

We meet our judges after the performance. They exchange a number of amusing one-liners before voting on who should win. The whole scene is pretty fluff-tastic. Nothing of particular note happens. New Directions stands outside the door listening as hard as they can, hoping to glean some degree of information or inkling of the state of things. While waiting in the hall, Eve, the director for the Girls School, shows up with the intention of removing her girls from the competition by revealing the shenanigans of Sue Sylvester. Before she can though, the judges declare that they've made a decision. Before we can hear it though, we need to check in with Will.

Will is at home. he's getting monkey-suited up, as Terri enters. He tells her he's getting ready for the wedding. He also tells her that they're getting a divorce. He shows up at the VFW Hall to find an empty hall with a shit ton of decorations. We discover that Ken called off the wedding and broke up with Emma because she took the faculty advisor position. Will tries to move in on that, and we have a slight disaster when she says that it can't happen. She also says she's leaving the school because she feels so shitty being there. Before this can be resolved though, we need to check in with Sue, Figgins and Will. They're in Figgins' office.

Figgins explains that the directors from both schools have fingered Sue and given ample evidence that she was responsible for sabotaging the glee club at Sectionals. She is outraged. She is suspended.Will is thrilled. She says, "I beg your pardon" about seven times and every time is funnier than the last. Again, phenomenal actress. I wish everybody on television had her timing and delivery. Will gets reinstated as director of new Directions, and he and Sue have a final face off in the hallway, where she promises to return and make his life even worse than it already is. He is not afraid of her bullshit. In the choir room, the glee club reveals their first place trophy, which they won regardless of the shenanigans.

And the episode rounds out with a great rendition of My Life Would Suck Without You. The episode ends though with one last great scene the long-awaited kiss between Emma and Will. That wraps up the first half of season one of Glee. Stay tuned for more Gleewinds. Glee returns on February Sixth, and Katrina should have the new gleecap up shortly thereafter.