The Town

"This is not the fucking-around crew" -- Adam Frawley 

Sense memory is weird. I didn't believe it existed for a long time as anything other than a subset of affective/emotional memory for method acting. I had never experienced it before 2007. It just never really mattered to me, and when people would mention it in conversation, I assumed they were full of shit. For those unaware, sense-memory is the interaction of the five senses with memory. Or, in simpler terms when some external stimuli, sight, smell, touch, taste or sound, instigates a memory recollection. It is a widely discussed, documented and studied phenomenon that has granted extensive insight for scientists, psychologists and whatnot with regard to our minds, and memories, and how they work. So, why bring this up on this particular Wednesday? Well, I have been affected by sense-memory near constantly for the past few days pretty heavily, and it got me to thinking about how I used to not even believe in its existence.

I am a skeptical person by nature. Anything I have not personally experience or studied myself, I hold in my B column until such a time as I have been able to verify it. I guess nothing from my youth had a very big impression on me because not only do I remember next to nothing before the age of 12, I can't say I have much desire to know any of it, and frankly, nothing I've ever tasted (etc) has had any real recollective affect on me. I didn't experience sense memory, like I said, until 2007. It was summer of 2007, and I was at the hospital. In a courtyard, I was sitting and reading a book when I heard a distinct sound, the sound of bronze bells. I can't even begin to describe the sound itself. It is hollow and heavy, It's a distinct and clear noise that anybody who has lived at Arcosanti can identify immediately. I knew, without seeing the bell that it was from the Arizona high desert, and I know it came from Arcosanti, because Cosanti bells sound different from Arco bells. Immediately memories flooded my mind. I hadn't lived at Arcosanti for over a year at this point and I remember dicking around in the Minds Garden and shouting poetry from the mouth of a cave. It was eerie.

To this day, I cannot eat an olive, or gargle with salt water without thinking of Arcosanti either. They both remind me of my time with the Landscaping crew, picking and brining olives every year. Bottling them at Randall's later in the year as well, changing brine and seasoning everything. Even the word olive makes me think of Arcosanti and how I was the olive boy for almost four years.

It happened to me a few nights ago. I ate a croissant stuffed with pepperoni and cheese and out of nowhere, I was sitting in the bakery all alone, rolling out dough, and stuffing croissants at six in the morning, eagerly waiting for the first tourists to come and visit. I started telling that friend about Arcosanti, and he seemed confused about why I had started the subject suddenly and without provocation. Later on, he said something about the year 1919, and it happened again, instead of sitting at Panera drinking smoothies, I was giving a tour on the top floor of the Crafts III building.

Then last night, it happened once more. This time, it was a combination of sight and sound. I was watching Chuck. If you don't watch Chuck, essentially the titular character was contemplating an opportunity to propose, and he had a box with a ring inside. Throughout the entire episode, he kept fiddling with the box. We never got a great look at it really, but we knew it was red. He kept opening and closing the box. When he opened it, there was the slightest creaking noise, and when he close it, it spring-loaded snapped closed. I wasn't paying attention to the episode, but every time i heard these noises I'd get a chill and cringe. I couldn't figure it out. Then, near the end of the episode, I saw the image to the left. It may not seem like it, but this box doesn't just hold a ring. No. This box holds months of pain and suffering. I still didn't understand why I hated this box so much until I went to congratulate my former boss on his new babies.

As I was typing a message on his facebook wall, it happened. Something about the sounds, the box and the person, John, made me remember. This was a red box from Finlay. Finlay Fine Jewelry is a company we both worked for in the past, and Red Boxes were reserved for Special Value Merchandise. Essentially if something was uncommonly gaudy or poorly made, the company would buy it in bulk and give it a special price that was still way too expensive, and it would get priority billing in this terrifying box. I hated these boxes. They would snap shut at the slightest touch, or not at all. They creaked slowly when opened and represented everything I hated about that job. These boxes, the sounds they made had the ability to create a palpable bubble of ire from deep within me and it was fascinating when I finally figured it out.

my question, dear reader, for you today, is: What sense memories have you experienced? Are there certain noises or colors or whatnot that evoke particular emotional responses? HAve you experience sense-memory at all?